… when suddenly my spectacles’ prescription ran out. So said Steven Wright[1]. I always thought that was funny in an new-way-to-see-it kind of way but as with a number of things that reference US culture — usually The Simpsons — it’s funnier (and in this case, sadder) when you have even more knowledge of the environment from which it comes. To wit, corrective lens prescriptions actually do run out in the US.

Glasses — though I’m not sure about general reading spectacles — are treated more or less as a drug. Contact lenses are regulated by the US Food and Drug Administration and cannot be purchased without a current prescription, with lens prescriptions being valid for a year. This contrasts with my experience in Germany — not exactly noted for its free-wheeling market approach — where contact lenses were available off the rack in a supermarket. I assume they are regulated in some way, like many products, but their availability didn’t appear to be hampered. This statement quite surprised my optometrist who obviously knew of all the untold dangers an incorrect prescription might foist upon an unsuspecting victim. He was just a little hard pressed to give them when I asked what they were.

My point to him was: if you put on someone else’s glasses, immediately you know they are not right, even for subtly difference prescriptions. If you keep them on you merely get a headache, possibly a very big headache. If you persist even further and determinedly work through that migraine then — and here is the dangerous part — your brain simply adapts. This is quite a different danger to taking the wrong drug or dosage that might, say, cause your kidneys to fail or your stomach to start bleeding. If there are more severe consequences to purchasing contacts on an out-of-date prescription, please chime in. I’d hate to think my many German friends are needlessly and thoughtlessly exposing themselves.

Don’t get me wrong, I believe in having the correct prescription for your genetically (or otherwise) inferior eyes. When I made the jump to contacts a little while ago I had an eye examination and a couple of lessons on the fitting and care of them. I was pretty sure my prescription hadn’t changed and, when it came time to resupply in the US, I had trouble finding lenses in the stores. I was told by an optician friend that I would need a prescription before purchasing. Bit strange, I thought but no problem, I’ll get them online … however they do require you to disclose your optometrist. Unfortunately, they didn’t have a listing for that nice lady in Germany. Eventually, of course, I had to play the game, coughed up my money for, effectively, a lens subscription, but not without clear-sighted protestations. Oh, and my freshly-minted prescription is identical to my previous.

[1] Possibly.

As mentioned previously, one of the main aspects of moving internationally is becoming a part of, and learning new systems. Inevitably, one will encounter the tax system and figuring this one out can be a major achievement. Australian, Dutch and German tax systems were, for me, relatively straightforward. I have pretty simple financial affairs and have always completed and filed my own tax return. In the Netherlands, as in Australia, you can download a computer program (the Dutch have one for Linux, Mac and Windows) which asks you a series of questions, has you report certain numbers and then lets you submit it electronically, usually with a refund showing up in your bank account a few weeks to a month later. Even with my limited Dutch, I needed little help in completing it.

The US seem to have taken a different route, or not travelled there yet. When tax return time rolled around in April, and after looking through a bit of tax documentation, I determined that I needed professional help. I picked the name of a well-known tax agent organisation and gave them a call but because of my immigration status (non-immigrant alien) the average agent couldn’t help me and so I was eventually passed onto someone who could prepare my particular tax return form (a 1040NR). Since only I have a US Social Security number and in order to claim Gaynor and the children as dependants, we had to apply for Individual Tax Identification Numbers (ITIN, usually said ‘I-TIN’) for each of them.

1st application: Rejected due to uncertified proof-of-identity documentation. Needed to reply within 45 days.
* Certification of documentation not so straightforward since Californian public notaries cannot certify copies of documents. Eventually worked around this by having a public notary certify (and receive an oath) of my own affidavit that they are true copies. This appears to be acceptable to the IRS. I think they just care for the stamp. 🙂
* Before figuring out the workaround with the public notaries, I waited two hours in an IRS office in Laguna Niguel so that they could sight the documentation, thus circumventing the need for a public notary who could not certify document copies. Result: man at the counter told me he didn’t know if I was even allowed to apply for ITINs and it was my responsibility to go find out.
* Spoke to the IRS who told me I couldn’t get an extension to the 45 days but as long as it was postmarked within that time that it would be acceptable.
* Resubmitted with certified documentation, with letter sent certified mail and postmarked within the 45 day time limit (just).
* Received a letter shortly after stating that I had failed to respond within 45 days and that my return would be sent forward for processing.

2nd application: Spoke with IRS about the 45-day-limit rejection letter. They suggested that the postmark had been ignored and that I should resubmit:.
* I prepare a new submission — knowing now how to get a public notary to ‘certify’ the documentation — but before I send that in (it takes me a few weeks to get everything done) I receive another letter stating that the 1st application has been rejected due to an unknown visa type.
* Letter didn’t actually state that it was an unknown visa type — I found that out after calling the IRS to discuss the letter. Apparently the E3 visa isn’t on their books. In all fairness, it has only been around for 3 years.
* IRS suggested that I resubmit the application but leave the visa information part of the form blank. The idea being that the visa information of Gaynor and the children was not needed to establish identity or eligibility to be in the country, only mine mattered.
* 2nd application aborted.

3rd application: Resubmitted all forms and ‘certified’ documentation for Gaynor and the children, leaving their visa information blank, as suggested. Essentially, this is a completely new application.
* A few weeks later, received rejection notices saying that the application was outside the 45 day time limit and that the tax return would be sent forward for processing.
* Spoke with the IRS who had no real better suggestion than to tell us to make a new application. Could not answer my simple question of “And why would it be treated any differently this time?”
* Thinking I could get to the root of the problem and speak to the IRS Unit who actually handled the applications, I was told by the representative that there was no phone number I could contact them on. And the representative could only guess at the reasons based on the limited information they had access to.
* One IRS representative — who was the first one who had ever apologised for the difficulties — asked to speak with Gaynor, who is actually one of the submitters. After explaining most of the above history, Gaynor was put through to the legal department to ascertain her eligibility to actually apply for the ITIN. After speaking with legal, who confirmed her eligibility, she was put through to a representative who was going to make a note on her record so that when we personally went to the IRS to apply we wouldn’t be rejected based on the employee there not knowing so much. This final representative then informed Gaynor, when she finally got through, that she (the representative) had no way of knowing that Gaynor had just spoken with legal and could not make any such note.
* A week or so later I received a letter from the IRS stating that I owe them approximately $410 in taxes.

Current status: Have not paid the claimed taxes yet. I distrust the ability of the IRS to return it when the ITINs are finally assigned. Not even sure the IRS can sort out the ITINs 🙂 In what we hope is the last resort, Gaynor and I are planning to visit an IRS office together and make the application personally. Hope springs eternal.

I used to think that Americans didn’t like paying taxes and hated the IRS for that reason. Now I’m more of the opinion that they hate paying taxes and hate the IRS because they are incompetent. I used to think that Americans, like most people, decried an increase in taxes but, having personally lived in countries with higher tax rates, I just thought they didn’t understand that generally one received more services for those tax dollars (or euros). Now I’m of the opinion that they don’t want to hand over more tax dollars because their incompetent bureaucracies have wasted what they already have, so why would you give them more?

These may be harsh opinions — and they may change as we live here longer — but I actually feel like we had less difficulties with German bureaucracy (even when done via the Dutch system) than we have had here.